61 Comments

Beautiful sentiments and the photos of your dad are just so telling, a kind man indeed.

Stories were so real and touching; I feel I know him, and what a presence and living spirit your crafted. But that boy from grade school, now grown into a nearly 60 year old man,--- I'd love to talk with him and find out where that hatred came from, and how he rid himself of it---if, indeed he has.

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Thank you so much, Barb. Maybe one day I will talk to him after all and learn more about where he was coming from. If we get to the fiftieth reunion, maybe that will be the time, if not before. ❤️

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Tanya, this is such a beautiful, painful, but also inspiring piece of writing. Wow. Your father, what a magnificent human. Thank you for writing this. All the best, Yehuda

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Thank you so much, Yehuda. I'm so glad it moved you, and I really appreciate the kind words. Yes, my Vati was a mensch. I miss him every day. ❤️

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Beautiful story told with such poignant feeling - forgiveness is not an easy thing. Thank you for sharing.

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Thank you so much, Linda. Glad you enjoyed it.

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Dear Tanya, forgiveness is so hard, but so liberating when we can release it. Thank you for this beautiful frank telling of your journey. So pertinent as you say, at this time, when even those of us on the other side of the globe look on in horror at what might be after the US elections. Be safe, be strong, be free.

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Thank you, Glenda. May you too be safe and strong and free in the face of all things.

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I love this story. Forgiveness is sometimes too much for us to bear on our own. I had abusers that I couldn’t forgive but it was for my own sake that I forgive them. So the best I could do for a very long time was to lay it in God’s hands. I was led to a Tibetan Buddhist practice of sending certain gemstone colours from the heart, throat and forehead, like a ruby, sapphire and diamond river toward that person, like a gift. That was the best I could do and it really changed things for me.

I am reading All the Light We Cannot See, by Anthony Doerr, right now. It is historical fiction set in World War Two and one of the protagonists is a German boy, an orphan. His perspective of events has given me a whole new view of some of the German soldiers, boys who were both forced to follow the rules and what happened to those who broke the rules. It is such a beautiful book, written by, what could only be, a beautiful person.

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Thank you for your thoughtful comment, Eliza. I agree that we are not always ready or able to forgive. It is a journey each person must navigate for themselves. And I

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Hi Tanya - thank you for responding. I appreciate your words. It looks like your last sentence was cut off. I am just wondering if there was more you wanted to write. You have,"And I..."

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Oh, oops. I meant to say, and I also loved "All the Light We Cannot See." What a wonderful book.

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Tanya, this gently, quietly and elegantly powerful. Your Vati was an amazing human being, and his impact on your humanity is...tangible. ❤️☀️🙏🏿

It was just 3 weeks ago we were hanging out at Oberlin for reunion, right?

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Thank you so much, Toju. I really appreciate your words. And wow, yes, three weeks ago. What a wonderful weekend that was. Sending love. ❤️

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Wow,

Wonderful writing Tanya! Love the picture of your father when he was young & the two of you. Thinking of Hans here in Carmel & how sad I couldn’t make it to dinner with you. God bless. Your father would be so proud🙏🤗

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Thank you so much, Jeanne! Hopefully we will get to meet up on another occasion! ❤️

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The world could do with mor men of your father's values and beliefs. We are blessed that you share them and blessed that you share his wisdom which has rubbed off on you with us. The power of the whisper 50 years ago has been assuaged by the power of your whispered forgiveness in 2024. It is sad to think of the upbringing of that boy , he was repeating what he lived, which is no excusebut sadly still occurs. Thank you for sharing. It had a profound effect on me.

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Thank you so much for your kind words, Linda. I'm so glad you were moved by the piece. ❤️

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Tanya, this piece is so thoughtful and moving, thank you for your beautiful writing.

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Thank you so much, Elise. ❤️

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Lovely and compelling, Tanya. Thanks you for sharing, and cheers to you, and your Vati’s memory. Familiar story in many ways. Mahalo, D 🤙🏻

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Thank you, Daniel. ❤️

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Wow, Tanya.... Forgiveness is I suppose about healing ourselves. My struggle is with the "you made your bed, now sleep in it". I'm more than happy to never hear from the people who did me harm. The made bed thing, is when I learn about how the perpetrators have befallen on hard times...... it's difficult not to gloat. But there is a feeling of karmic return and also profound sadness. I just hope I'm paying forward kindness on those suffering or needing it. Which is just about everybody.

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Thank you for this, George. You're right when you say just about everyone is suffering and needs kindness. Especially in these fraught times. Big hugs to you. ❤️

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Thank you for sharing this lovely story on forgiveness. To be able to forgive someone is a true gift

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Thank you, Johanna! ❤️ I enjoyed seeing your beautiful daughter last week when she was passing through. Now you get to have her close by! 😊

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This piece had me with a long hard cry. So utterly beautiful and transporting. Thank you!

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Thank you so much, dear Amy. ❤️

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Thank you for your beautiful essay, Tanya. You give us a lot to think about in this chaotic world.

Your Vati was an incredible, sensitive human being.

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Thank you so much, Robin. Yes, he was a joyful and loving being. I am grateful I got to have him as long as I did. ❤️

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Powerful!!!

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Thank you! ❤️

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I love this post, Tanya. Thank you as always for sharing your vulnerability and wisdom. 💗

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Thanks so much, Samia! Much love. ❤️

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